“Shut the Hell Up About Pokemon"

and other heartwarming stories from Menses Surveillance Czar JD Vance

Last week JD Vance appeared on the NELK Boys Full Send podcast and said “My son, who is seven, is in the hotel room with me, And he is really into Pokémon cards right now. He's going through a Pokémon phase...he's really into it. So he's trying to talk to me about Pikachu and I'm on the phone with Donald Trump and I'm like, 'Son, shut the hell up for 30 seconds about Pikachu,'" Vance said. "This is the most important phone call of my life. Please just let me take this phone call."

I have three kids. Three kids is a lot. I also have a very busy and stressful professional life. I don’t sleep enough. Like every other parent out there, sometimes I lose my shit with my kids. If a parent ever tells you they don’t, they are lying to you. What I have NEVER done, however, is tell one of my children to shut the hell up. I have never. I would never. And if I ever heard an adult say “shut the hell up” to a seven-year-old (A SEVEN-YEAR-OLD), whether it be out in public or in the confines of a children’s hospital I would be INCREDIBLY alarmed.